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36 Best Death Puns That Will Make You Cringe

36 Best Death Puns That Will Make You Cringe

October 10, 2019

Death is probably one of the biggest fears for many people. At the same time, it is an unavoidable part of our lives. But why don’t we laugh about it and have more fun? After all, life is too short to worry about what you cannot experience. Therefore, it is better to think positive and face any challenge in daily life. So, check out the following best death puns and you will have nothing to be scared about.

Best Death Puns

best death puns


1. Do you hear about the man who died skydiving? He was having a lot of fun and believed that deploying the parachute could be a total drag.


2. The boy drowned. All of his classmates showed up at the funeral with a life jacket on because it is what he would have wanted.


3. Do you know what is the difference between death and marriage? – Dead people are always free from their partner.


4. The only difference between death and sex is that you could die alone and no one would laugh at you.


5. He was going to tell me a dead baby joke. But then he decided to abort.


6. What would the victim of plague say when his or her skin turned black? “I feel like I have dyed a little bit inside.


7. The bourbonic plague is probably the most likely Black Death version that would hit any person with alcoholic abuse.


8. What would happen to a deposed king? – He would be throne away.


9. A professional skier will never die. He or she just goes downhill.


10. Now that Mozart is dead, what he could do now is to de – compose.


11. When an astronaut dies, he will run an orbit – uary.


12. The family of chemists would barium them when they die.


13. Twin monks who ring the church bells have died. They are now dead ringers.


14. The job that you die for often comes with a killer boss.


15. You should never speak ill of the dead because it would be a grave mistake.


16. My grandfather always loved writing songs. Now when he died, he would have more time decomposing.


17. At the funeral of my friend, I tried to think of a pun to commemorate him. However, I decided not to do it because that could be a grave mistake.


18. All of us want to live life to the fullest. Thus, do not be afraid when it is time for the death’s turn.


19. Just several months before she died, my aunt had her back covered with lard. Since then, she went downhill really fast.


20. My sister passed away because we could not remember her blood type. In the last few days of her life, she kept encouraging us to “be positive”, but it could be hard without her.


21. A girl who has been recently into astronomy asks her mother how stars die. The mom tells her: “Often due to an overdose.”


22. I try to cheer my sister up when her cat died by getting her another identical one. However, she just gets more upset and screams: “What would I do with two dead cats?”


23. I will never forget what Charlie told me before he passed away yesterday: “Hey John, are you still holding my ladder?”


24. A sign at the cemetery reads: “Do not pass, anyone who violates would face a grave charge.”


25. Two streakers were found dead yesterday. Policemen said that the details are relatively revealing.


26. A cartoonist was found dead in the office. Policemen said that the details are sketchy.


27. A will would be considered as a dead giveaway.


28. Do you hear about the woman who was buried alive accidentally? That was a grave mistake.


29. I just get a new job in a big tech company. My advice for you is to show the great passion for not starving to death.


30. He does not like black jokes since he still has one in his family tree. She is still hanging there.


31. An orthodontist was recently found killed with an axe. Nevertheless, nobody was arrested because the police declared that it was an axe-idental case.


32. Forming a cul-de-sac could be a relatively dead-end job.


33. People are just dying to get in the graveyard.


34. Autopsy is known as a drying practice.


35. My friend wants to be a suicide bomber but he just cannot live like that.


36. Thousands of people die from vacuum-related accidents each year. That really sucks!


Death is a word that strikes fear in our hearts. It makes most of us feel uncomfortable. But with this list of witty death puns, we hope that you can now see it as a normal part that would happen at any time. If you still want more, then check out the following posts on pumpkin puns, jazz puns, as well as ice puns.

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