Nothing can get you in that holiday mood like some silly Christmas puns. Put aside time for wrapping presents later and hold off decorating the Christmas tree because these 63 little puns are going to help spruce your home with holiday cheers.
Best Christmas Puns
1. Christmas dinner with my in-laws is great because it is the one time you can really talk turkey.
2. Right before we head out to the Christmas party we like to get all spruced up.
3. There might not be any Christmas presents this year because we heard that Santa has come down with the flue.
4. The Christmas turkey decided to join the holiday band because he had the drum sticks.
5. Don’t worry about Santa arriving at you house late this year because he always arrives just in the Nick of time.
6. On the 25th of December you can hears the cows out in the pasture all going Moooory Christmas.
7. My little neighbors says he calls St. Nick by Santa Caus because there is no-el.
8. The Christmas elf decided to push his bed into the fireplace because tonight he wanted to sleep like a log.
9. Those who are afraid to see Santa Claus on Christmas morning are said to be claus-trophobic.
10. Santa has three different gardens at the North Pole because he loves to ho-ho-ho.
11. The little snowmen love to eat their snowflakes for breakfast each morning.
12. A flamingo at the North Pole is better known as lost.
13. They mistakenly put Santa in jail last night because they heard that he sleighed an elf.
14. The best kind of Christmas candy canes are the ones in mint condition.
15. The elf at the Christmas party who was an excellent singer was also known as a wrapper.
16. The only type of Christmas dessert you should never trust are mince-spies.
17. That Christmas turkey was not hungry today because he said he was already stuffed.
18. Before the little gingerbread man went to bed his mother would put down a new cookie sheet.
19. Scrooge won the football game because the ghost of Christmas passed.
20. The difference between the regular alphabet and the Christmas alphabet is the Christmas alphabet has no-el.
21. That green frog covered with tinsel was known as a mistletoad.
22. All the monkeys in the jungle sing jungle bells at Christmas time.
23. Bad knitters and Christmas trees both drop their needles.
24. Never eat the decorations at a Christmas party of you could come down with a case of tinselitis.
25. The salt and the pepper at the Christmas party always exchange season’s greetings.
26. The bald man told his daughter that he loved the comb he got for Christmas so much he would never part with it.
27. Similar to athletes foot, on Christmas an astronaut can get missile toes.
28. The combination of a Macintosh and Christmas tree produces a pine-apple.
29. When Santa and Mrs. Claus are on vacation they like to ride an icicle built for two.
30. Before Santa’s elves can read they all have to learn the elf-abet.
31. When the elves are not riding in Santa’s sleigh, they all drive mini vans.
32. If any of Santa’s reindeer lose their tails on the long journey they simply stop at the re-tail shop to get another.
33. After Santa fell in a blazing fireplace he was known around the North Pole as Krisp Kringle.
34. The one thing Santa can give away and still keep for himself is a cold.
35. When Santa was younger and did not have any money he was known as Saint Nickeless.
36. The one thing that reindeer have that no other animal is the world has is baby reindeer.
37. Frosty the Snowman always keeps the money he gets on Christmas in a local snow bank.
38. Everyone knows that before Santa heads out on Christmas day he eats his favorite cereal Frosted Flakes.
39. You can not take a picture of Santa when he comes to your house is because you need a North Pole-aroid camera.
40. Santa would make a great race car driver because he is always in the Pole position.
41. An easy way to tell that you are getting older is Santa starts looking younger.
42. The mean Daddy gave his kids batteries for Christmas this year with a note that read toys not included.
43. The reason why Comet, Cupid, Prancer, and Rudolph are always wet is because they are rain-deer.
44. The only thing that December has that the rest of the months do not is the letter D.
45. Before Santa’s reindeer tell jokes they always say that these will sleigh you.
46. Santa does not have to pay anything for his sleigh because it was on the house.
47. While Santa is out delivering presents on Christmas, all the elves at the North Pole chill out.
48. Rudolph would make a great weather forecaster because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear.
49. Santa took the gingerbread man to the doctor because he said he was feeling a little crummy.
50. Santa always knows when Christmas is coming by simply looking at his calen-deer.
51. Each Christmas morning the elves look at each other and say, small world, isn’t it?
52. The ghost family said that if Santa doesn’t arrive they will have a boo Christmas without you.
53. A Christmas snowman at the beach in summer is known as a puddle.
54. You know Santa must be good at karate because he has a big black belt.
55. The only type bug that does not celebrate Christmas is a hum-bug.
56. Mummies love Christmas because of all the wrapping.
57. This year Santa was a little upset because he got a ticket for parking his sleigh in a snow-parking zone.
58. I get the best presents each Christmas because I always leave Santa a peanut butter and jolly sandwich.
59. Before Santa leaves for the night he takes the Christmas tree to the barber to get trimmed.
60. Aliens refuse to celebrate Christmas because they do not want to give away their presence.
61. Santa has one cow with him at the North Pole because it gives him ice cream.
62. I wish you a warm and Merry Christmas, my deer!
63. Every morning, Santa Claus always has his breakfast with snow-flakes.
These silly Christmas puns should have you feeling as jolly as a snowman eating an iceburger. For more Christmas fun, check our latest post with some of the best puns or this one with good Halloween puns we love.