Shade your eyes, folks, here comes the sun! Actually, it’s just a whole batch of puns… But they’re so bright and beautiful that you’ll definitely need your sunglasses to read them! This innocuous item of facewear can actually give rise to a fair bit of hilarity. Don’t believe us? Just read on!
Best Sunglasses Puns
1 I asked my dad if he’d seen my sunglasses. He replied, “No, have you seen my dadglasses?”
2 My friends all either really love or really hate my new sunglasses. Apparently they’re very polarizing.
3 I never really mind leaving my sunglasses at home. At least it means I’ll be looking on the bright side of life.
4 Teachers of gifted students often have to wear sunglasses, because their students are so bright.
5 I always get asked to remove my sunglasses when I buy alcohol in a shop. I guess it must be because I look so shady.
6 It’s really sad, but I have to get rid of the sunglasses I’ve had forever. They have a scratch in them and I just don’t think I can see past it.
7 It’s obvious why the Feds always wear sunglasses. It’s to protect their F B Eyes, of course!
8 Do you know how to make an elephant invisible? Put sunglasses on it. Have you ever seen an elephant in sunglasses?
9 Why are shades made from Hydrogen and Helium? Because they’re sungasses.
10 There’s only one animal that wears sunglasses. It’s called a solar bear.
11 What does the sun drink out of? Sunglasses, of course.
12 Sunglasses are actually pretty arrogant. They consider themselves to be above the nose.
13 Have you ever tried giving a potato a pair of sunglasses? It makes them into spectaters.
14 I always buy my sunglasses off the black market. The quality is very good, but there’s no denying that it’s pretty shady.
15 I saw a guy wearing sunglasses on a cloudy day. Clearly, not very bright.
16 When my friend finally removed their sunglasses, I exclaimed that I thought their eyes were blue. They replied “I must have left them in my other genes.”
17 My sin asked me to pass him his sunglasses. I replied, “You never told me you had a son called Glasses!”
18 I met a skinny man wearing sunglasses the other day. He called himself Slim Shady.
19 I wish Steve Irwin had been wearing sunglasses when he died. Apparently sunglasses can protect against harmful rays.
20 I ordered blue tinted sunglasses, but the company got the order wrong. Man, I was seeing red that day.
21 I was in the queue at the bank when a man walked in wearing sunglasses and a carrying a white stick, and held up the cashier. He was robbing us all blind.
22 Sunglasses are a bit like politicians… They’re cheap, easily bought and can be polarizing.
23 What did the zoo keeper say to the elephant who was wearing sunglasses? He didn’t say anything, because he didn’t recognize him.
24 I saw something brown and hairy and wearing sunglasses the other day. It was a coconut on his way to go on holiday.
25 Voldemort is the only member of the Harry Potter books, who hates the sun. It’s because his sunglasses never stay up.
26 Ned Flanders only wears one particular brand of sunglasses. He goes for OakleyDokelys.
27 Ever since I got my new sunglasses, I feel very suspicious all the time. Everything seems so shady.
28 I bought my husband some mirrored sunglasses. It has to be said, I look great in them.
29 Did you know pirates can’t wear sunglasses? It’s because they have no buccan-ears.
30 Since wearing sunglasses, I definitely sweat less. It’s because I feel so much cooler.
31 I decided to wear just sunglasses to watch the solar eclipse. I just can’t see what all the fuss was about.
32 The sunglasses I ordered were much darker than I was expecting. I blame a lack of transparency.
33 My friend was confused when he came across a pigeon wearing sunglasses. All it would say was “Coo, man, coo…”
34 What do sunglasses manufacturers and hitmen have in common? They are both involved in shady business.
35 I have a very rude friend, who said one day that women and the sun are similar. I asked him why, and he said “If you’re wearing sunglasses, you can stare at them for longer.”
36 A duck walked into an optician’s, and asked for a pair of sunglasses. The optician asked how he was going to pay for them; the duck replied “Just put them on my bill.”
37 Have you ever heard the phrase “Everyone should believe in something”? Well, my new sunglasses make me believe I should be at the beach.
38 My friend bought some sunglasses that didn’t suit her at all, but she insisted on wearing them. She made a right spectacle of herself.
39 People often ask me why I wear sunglasses all the time. I tell them it’s because my ideas are just too bright.
40 My girlfriend can’t understand why I wear sunglasses around her all the time. I tell her it’s because love is blind(ing).
41 It’s generally a good idea to check the sun before you decide weather or not to wear your sunglasses.
Sunglasses are a serious bit of kit, there’s no doubt about that. But they can also give rise to a fair bit of humor! Bring a few of these puns (or these about summer) out the next time you’re researching your next pair of Ray Bans, and you’ll understand what we mean.